Is She Scared?

Written by Lucia.


Dear Lucia,

I have been seeing this wonderful woman for about 9 months. For the last 6-7 weeks we have been talking on the phone several times a day and spending a lot of time together.  I send her flowers once a week, and other days I'll put a flower or poem I've written on her car in the morning.

She recently expressed that she wanted to take a step back and slow things down a bit. I love her and have told her. She says she loves me also. Is she scared? Are things moving too fast? Am I about to lose this girl? If so, what can I do to stop from losing her? Rob J.

Dear Rob,

The answer to three of your four questions: Yes! Yes! Yes! Slow down Romeo. The fact that you've been together for 9 months and things started to change once the constant stream of flowers and poems began, means you're overwhelming her.

It's possible to feel two conflicting emotions at the same time. While we all yearn to be in a loving relationship, we also have the desire to be free. This is a human paradox you must always keep in mind.

What to do? Back off. Stop the flowers, poems, multiple daily phone calls. Eventually, you can start to do those things again, but only in small doses. Good luck.

Tags: woman scared of relationship giving too much in a relationship giving a woman flowers

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