Hi Lucia,
I am 24 years old and I have gone through three rough relationships - the last one being the worst. I dated a single mother who cheated on me with her baby's dad. After this happened, it was over.
It has been two years and I have not gone out with any women since. I basically gave up. I often think that I need a therapy. I see someone but I just think negatively and don’t ask for number or a date. What can I do to get my confidence back?
Alone in Burbank
Hi Alone,
You’re too young to be so down on love.
You had 3 relationships by the time you were 22. I say that’s 3 too many. Your late teens and early twenties should be about having fun and keeping it light. You want to find out who you are and what you like.
Scientists at the NIH campus at Bethesda, Md. found out that the part of the brain that weighs risks, makes judgments and controls impulsive behavior isn’t fully mature until age 25. This means you shouldn’t even be thinking about a serious relationship until your next birthday.
Since your last break up was so devastating that you haven’t dated in 2 years, I would say some therapy would definitely help. You will eventually get your confidence back. Use the experience from your previous liaisons to make better choices in the future.
