Hi Lucia,
I was recently involved with a lady who stated she wasn’t looking for a commitment. She apparently came out of a bad relationship and didn’t want anything heavy.
I deceived myself into believing I was ok with this concept and we went on a few dates
During this process she would have moments of declaring her “ like” for me and also moments where she reminded me of her non-committal state of mind.
I developed feelings and started backing away (mostly because I realized it wouldn’t be reciprocated and because I initiated a significant portion of our contact). She would reach out during this period and I made sure to refrain from initiating contact.
About a month ago, she reached out stating she really wanted to speak to me and I gave her my availability. She didn’t contact me at the agreed time and sent a text apologizing. She requested another time to reach out and I gave her one. It’s been radio silence since then.
I really need to know what next? Is this the ultimate “bread crumbing”?
I have refused to reach out as she was the one who wasn’t looking for a serious commitment and needed to talk to me. Am I wrong here? Victor
Hi Victor,
Not only did she breadcrumb you, but now she also ghosted you.
Your first mistake was getting involved with someone who had just come out of a bad relationship. When someone is in that state of mind, it’s best to leave them alone until they are somewhat back to normal. Your second mistake was deceiving yourself into believing that you would be OK with casual dating.
This was doomed to fail from the start.
Do not contact her, otherwise you'll look thirsty, since she's the one who said she wanted to talk to you, and then disappeared.
Wait until you hear from her, and if you’re still interested in dating her, remember to keep it casual, unless she says she wants something more.
