Hi Lucia,
There is so much information out there these days about how to behave when you’re dating someone that I’m starting to get confused. Some of it is even contradictory that I don’t know what to believe. Do you have something easy I can keep in mind so that I can get and keep a partner? Alessandra
Hi Alessandra,
I know what you mean. Too much analysis leads to paralysis! I do have a way to simplify everything.
There can be no love without respect. You can’t love someone you don’t respect and if someone doesn’t respect you, they won’t fall in love/stay in love either.
This means that when you are trying to figure out how to handle a situation, ask yourself: If I do/don’t do or say/don’t say this, will I gain respect or lose respect in their eyes? Your goal is to always have the person see you as someone they hold in the utmost esteem.
A woman I know was falling in love with a man until she saw him yelling at one of his employees and being rude to someone in the supermarket. It was downhill from there.
A lot of the dating advice is really about getting and keeping the other person’s respect. This is why you often hear that you should not call back or text back right away, not be available at the last minute for a date, not ask questions such as, “Where were you?” “Why didn’t you call me” Where is this going, etc.
Everyone wants to feel they have a prize, someone valuable. If your words or actions are not going to add value, then say/do it.
